By Howard A. Love, LCPC, CSAT, CMAT, Antioch Group
Recently, while leading a therapy group I asked the question: “What are the components of decision making?” The group decided to identify possible hindrances first. They came up with the following list:
- One’s mood and stress level
- Lack of self-awareness
- Difficulty distinguishing between right or wrong decisions
- Lack of knowing or applying spiritual values
- The inability to connect the past and the present as a predictor of the future
The list, while not exhaustive, clearly represents a number of complex issues. Recognizing this, one member spoke up and indicated we need “a ‘road map’ to guide us.” Indeed, a “road map” is precisely what is needed, and I offered the following for developing good, sound judgment in decision-making.
- Employ spiritual values
- Set personal goals
- Seek out an accountability person or mentor
- Utilize and apply all previous knowledge and resources available
- Be teachable — be willing to always be a learner of yourself
- Discover the difference between needs and wants
- Develop balance in your overall lifestyle
- Do not say toxic or negative things to yourself
- Learn to set healthy boundaries: separate what is important to someone else and what might be useful for you to take to heart
- Do not make assumptions, they only lead to more confusion
Learning to be confident in decision-making involves a concrete set of steps. That is, having a definite plan and then breaking it down into particular parts to avoid being overwhelmed.
We could think of it this way: some decisions need to be made now; some need thought and planning. We get into trouble when we do not see a choice needs to be made and we ignore the reality of the consequences that may result from indecisiveness. A commitment to sound decision-making can be thought of as four parts of a whole:
- Realize you cannot predict with one hundred-percent certainty how that decision will play itself out. (Most decisions are made without knowing the full ramifications of the outcome.).
- Have the courage to give yourself permission to be on a learning curve that includes trial and error.
- Utilize every person and resource you have at your disposal. Seeking wise counsel is vital.
- When a decision is reached, be definitive.
Many times learning from the experiences of others can be priceless. We often need people who have wisdom beyond our own experiences. We need someone’s testimony of success or suffering to give us the guidance we may so desperately need. As we develop the skills and confidence to make better decisions, we must make frequent steps along our journey through life to evaluate our compass to assure our direction. By employing all or parts of the suggestions in this article we can realize the benefits of healthy, consistent, decision making.
For additional information or questions, you may contact the Antioch Group at 309-692-6622, or visit www.antiochgroup.com.
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