By Phillip J. Ladd, LCPC, Co-Owner John Day Christian Psychological
Some of you may be familiar with that time-honored story about the board meeting that Satan called in Hell. He put this question to his senior advisors: We need to develop a new strategy for causing havoc upon the Earth. Do you have any suggestions for a new means of reaching human beings for our side? One advisor suggested, “Tell them there is no Heaven.” Another said, “Tell them there is no Hell.” However, the prize-winning suggestion was judged to be much more effective, “Tell them there is no hurry.” Whether you believe in Satan, Heaven, or Hell, it is a cute story that makes a point.
Now, I do want to clarify that in some things in life, we do need to slow down, not hurry, and be patient as we take time to make really important decisions in life.
However, could I suggest to you that in some important matters in life, there is indeed a very big hurry? Consider, for example, how urgent it may be that we demonstrate our affection for those we love. When the late “Dear Abby” was asked what letter was requested the most for reprinting, she put into her syndicated column this one: “Dear Abby, I am the most heartbroken person on Earth. I always found time to go everywhere else but to see my gray-haired parents. They sat at home alone, loving me just the same. It is too late now to give them those few hours of happiness I was too selfish and too busy to give. Now when I go to visit their graves . . . I wonder if God will ever forgive me for the heartaches I must have caused them . . .”
Some may be familiar with a quality literary person from the past, Samuel Johnson. Johnson’s father was a seller of books. In those days, he went from town to town to sell his books. One time when his dad as very sick and completely exhausted from his tiring work to support his family, he asked his son, Samuel, to go to the market to try selling his books since he was too weak to go. Samuel was too prideful and self-centered at the time, so he refused to do as his dad had requested. Therefore, as the story is told, his dad, in a very weakened and sick condition, made the painful trip to the market himself — never rebuking or saying harsh words to his son.
Fifty years later, the popular, respected, and accomplished Samuel Johnson stood for many hours in the cold in the same market where his dad had his stand to sell books. People would come by, stare at him and wonder what he was doing there in the cold rain and wind. He reports that he was remembering that time long ago when his sick and aging dad asked him a small favor that he selfishly refused to do.
Back when I was a pastor, I remember the many times of being there with families as they were approaching the death of a loved one. I do not remember any of them speaking of how they wished they had spend more time at the office or time doing other busy and important things. I remember it always being about relationships. I remember expressions such as: “I wish we had more quality time together,” “I wished I had expressed my care more often,” “I wish I could go back and change things so we were happier together.” Those are the things that I remember in those occasions — it being about relationships.
There is an urgency about love, is there not? Children grow up so quickly. Time takes its toll in the aging process. There are some people whose love we treasure today who might not be with us tomorrow, or next week, or next year. If we are going to take time to show our love for one another, we had better do it now. There is an urgency about the really important things in life. One of those urgent important things is demonstrating our love and affection for the people that we really care about. I believe that sometimes, there is an urgency about demonstrating love.
I remember a sermon by my late father by the title “Round to it.” He said that when he asked things of people that they often responded that they would do it when they could get “around to it.” So, during the sermon, he distributed something to everyone that said, “Round To It” on it. He then said, “Okay now, you all have a “Round to It,” so there are no more excuses.
Please do not put off showing true love and affection to those you really care about. Please do not use the excuse that you are too busy now and will do it when you get a “Round to It.” There is an urgency about showing love and care to those that are important to us. End the excuses and care now!
For more information or to book an appointment, contact John R. Day & Associates, Christian Psychological Associates, located at 3716 West Brighton Avenue, Peoria, or their additional locations in Normal, Canton, Pekin, Princeton, or Eureka. Call us at 309-692-7755 or visit us online at www.christianpsychological.org.